ASSAILED BY AGE

One of the more minor problems that accompanies old age is that there isn't really an acceptable term for it.  Senior Citizen doesn't really cut it no matter how carelessly it is thrown into the conversation.   But that's beside the point really because the major irritation of old age is that it descends upon the victim unnecessarily swiftly and silently, almost in slippered feet.   One minute you are carelessly in your late fifties and definitely middle aged and the next you are contemplating the inconvenience of cataracts and paying great attention to the rising cost of winter heating.  

When you become a Senior Citizen younger Citizens particularly those related to you by blood all of a sudden assume Rights over you.  They begin to invade your personal space whether you like it or not albeit in small ways at first.   They might make hurried visits to you during which they assume it's perfectly acceptable to switch off the radio programme you were half listening to, open all the windows and inspect the fridge just to acquaint themselves with what's inside.  If you fail to complain immediately within a week or two they will not only handing out advice as to how you can improve your life but expecting it to be promptly acted upon. 

Conversation changes especially discussion and debate on world affairs, matters upon which due to your great age you have always assumed you know a thing or two.  This may now be replaced by mini diatribes during which you are advised what in fact you may now believe if you want to be listened to at all for more than a minute and a half.     

But essentially none of the above, vexing though it all may be, needs to provoke murderous reaction.   What is much more likely to inflame the kind of rage that may well later be described as an episode of homicidal mania is when a bone in wrist or foot is for some reason or other damaged and a well-meaning neighbour queries in the kind of tone that should be reserved for a survivor of The Somme, if perhaps you slipped in the shower.  That might be bad enough but to add insult to injury your reply regarding the bus that came to a sudden halt may be ignored!

Or when the weather report advises unexpected showers and you sensibly take the folding walking stick out with you and yet another acquaintance strides in your direction to announce loudly and as if they are speaking with a two-year-old that it really is a Splendid Stick you are carrying! 

It all adds up to a sudden streak of social insensitivity perhaps but then again maybe when you join the ranks of those who are old you are no longer entitled to civility or charm.